Etro fashion
Yesterday, my first day off in a week, I went to buy a sponge mop at Target and ended up buying, along with the mop, a shirt and tie at Daffys. This is the lesson I've learned about cleaning up my image.

I didn't know there was a target above the Atlantic Avenue station on the subway, much less a Pathmark. No wonder there are no decent grocery stores in the neighborhood. Everyone goes to Pathmark. I've been going to the K-Mart on Astor Place for essentials but now I can go to Target and wander about with all the other mall rats.

The Target is understocked but generally looks like any other Target, including the extra lift for shopping carts. Not that I've been to many other Targets. I did go to one outside of St. Pete in Florida looking for a bike but didn't buy one and then walked to the Wal-Mart across the highway. A first, I'm sure. It was dangerous.

So I bought the mop then stopped in at Daffys, a clothing store that sells overstocked fashion with a cheeky attitude. I found a Tommy Hilfiger plaid shirt in vibrant red white and blue for $16 and an overly colorful tie for $10. I needed a new ensemble for work and my fashion sense is such that instead of color coordinating I go for maximum clash.

This morning I put the shirt and tie on and went to work at Macy's Men's Store, feeling like a nuclear reactor in the subway, the clash between the tie and the shirt was that extreme. At work people kept complimenting me on my tie and my boss was very impressed. He said it was very Etro. During the day my sales went up. People who never talked to me before were talking to me.

When I got home I looked up Etro on mens.style.com and fell in love with the clothes. The spring 2009 runway show even had old farts like me modeling (like every other hip designer). The old guys looked better in the mismatched patterns than the young models. If you're young and black or old and bland you can wear anything. To me the clothes looked normal, like paintings. I'm sure they cost a fortune and if I had the money I'd buy the lot but in the meantime I'll go to Daffys above the Atlantic Avenue Stop on the #3 train.

I'll post pictures of my fashion coup once I buy new batteries for my digital camera and figure out how to use the damn thing again.